Make it Rain

Meg rain

Theme: Money

***

by Kat

This week it’s all about the money (money, money…). Another day, another dollar. Stream-of-conscious brainstorm. Boom. Hurricane season.

At the moment: Take the course, pitch the article, connect – savvy, polished, professional wordsmith. Freelance to freedom. Transitional spending: track this, save that. I spend money like water and the going rate for creativity is allocated to a shoestring slush fund.

I used to barter pennies for thoughts. These days we are fortunate to keep our heads above water. We can even feed the kitty. Talk about ROI on a word. As a writer, I’m not the cash cow; I pay my dues and take my chances. I run for my own money.

Maybe I should cut my losses. Too many clichés. But I’m invested.

Easy money? Ass-dough. Thanks Google. That definition: value for money.

Bet your bottom dollar, money talks. From peanuts to cheddar, it seems like everyone is money hungry. No such thing as a free lunch when it comes to bread. It’s tough for any breadwinner in a post-Atkins world. Nailed that metaphor, right on the money. Especially when you don’t have two nickels to rub together. Nickels are small potatoes these days; they will not burn a hole in your pocket.

Money may not grow on that tree, but it thrives at that Apple. Maybe if I had a million dollars, I’d spend it like it’s going out of style. Maybe it is. I’d capitalize on Chinese dogs with bling – beer tastes on a champagne budget. Time is money; in this case, money buys time. But fools and their money are soon parted. The economics of money over sense.

Over the rainbow: pot of gold. Winnie the Pooh: pot of honey. Money pot; honey pot. Whoops. Mixed metaphors. Sex and money. Controversial. Buckets: absent sex appeal.

Even with buckets of money, there are two certainties: death and taxes. Bucket lists – experiences to do before you die. Redundant. Dance in the rain like no one is watching/ find my inner truth/ helicopter over a volcano prior to death, you say? Novelty. Kick the bucket. Put your money where your mouth is.

Risk aversion: not my forte. If it takes money to make money, get the best that money can buy. That is: make the most of what there is. Smart money follows value. Valuable. Valuation. Evaluation. Revisit, revise, reuse, recycle. Reevaluate. What is my worth? Where is my market place? Then existential bullshit.

Tangential: a love of money is the root of evil. How do we keep our currency amidst economic injustice, invested in the spoils of history coined by Benjamins and dead presidents? Love without respect can’t stay afloat. Unstable markets.

Wonder if Miss Piggy got money for her Time. Equal pay, equal work. Get paid top dollar. She’s bringing home all the bacon; better off than church mice, squirreling away nest eggs. What would Orwell write?

As for Moi? Subsidized: a la mode. Ennui de jour.

Are piggy banks en vogue? A penny saved is a penny earned: the bread-and-butter of childhood fiscal decision-making. De rigueur.

Money can’t buy love or happiness. But it can make ends meet. I’m awaiting the beginning.

Rain check.

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